IDK WTF I'm doing

Well, my Boosh Face suggested that I do this, and right now I'm doing anything I can to avoid writing the performance reviews I have due by the end of the month. So far I have made a kick ass mix for my Home-piece Brandonius, checked my fackbook 1000 times even though I know nobody's send anything new because of the 1000 times I've checked my hotmail account. I watched a half of an episode of House I've seen before, eatin 8 oreo cookies with no milk 'cause I'm lactose intolerant, a good hands full or two of pretzels dipped in Helluva Good french onion dip, smoked a cigarette, and now I'm listening to the mix I made writing down all these trivial things I've done, merely to avoid writing a performance review that has no good news inside. 

Why is it so difficult to deliver bad news? Especially when it seems like so much fun! I often day dream of really leaning into one my employees and giving 'em a piece of my mutherfucking mind. "Hey asshole, just do your goddam job for the fucking love of Pete!" I'd say, all the while with a grimacing face to accentuate my anger to their sheer stupidity.  Who knows! Maybe even point a finger or two. Then finish it off with a whollopping, "You'd better get your shit together, cause my patients is getting awfully fucking thin, and I' tired cleaning up your shit!" 

But that's not me at all, it comes out more like, "Hey...Listen...I think your doin' a great job but maybe we could do somethings better, maybe it's my fault, perhaps I haven't supported you enough." WHAT!? How did I come into this equation?   

I guess it's how I'd rather have someone talk to me, but people don't. I'm always made to feel quite the dick when people scold me. Is this what i need to do to get ahead, because if it is I say, "no thank you sir". 

Well, I think I've waisted enough time to have to get to bed and not do my work. I hope I don't miss my deadline.